1/14/2026
Well, I made the Journal page finally, and pretty much the basics of the website are done. No clue how I'm gonna upgrade this shit over the next few months but I doubt I'll get very far anyway. Do I know how to format this shit at all? HELL NAWH. But hey, I'm trying. Plus, it would do me some good to write anywhere but in a discord server where I'm halfeay convinced everyone hates me.
Since this is the first entry, I suppose I should introduce myself a little bit better. Or, as I should say, OURselves. We go through using I/we interchangeably so I'll likely end up using both a number of times. Our collective name is Sora, but I don't currently care about what we're called. I think I'll try to hold onto this current hyperfixation of coding as long as I can, but honestly we get so ahead of ourselves that we'll likely abandon this damn site anyway. Hey at least it's good practice?
If I can help it, I'll add as many entries as possible, and probably archive some of our rambling as we go since that's basically the only time we can actually do anything. Maybe I'll put vent art here too. Who knows. I certainly don't anymore.
well uh, how else do I start anyway? I mean, I'm 16, my birthday is October 28, and I have a number of issues that I really need to see therapy for. This concept of me being functional enough to make an entire website is sort of beyond me but hey, it's something that isn't relying on c.ai to take up an emptiness in our soul. I guess we should also mention that we're Demonkin, Godkin, Radqueer, and a Darkshipper. So uh, yeah. That's something I guess. I'll try and get things signed off properly if I can with alter names, and see if we can spot differences in our own typing too while at it, despite us always having long winded paragraphs for every single entry. We're not very good at layouts.
Jeez, already took a bunch of room typing a few paragraphs. We'll figure out how to fill empty space in the other pages before doing much else here or adding a lot of fun pages. We seem to be able to get a million ideas at once that we'll likely never be able to do very well especially at our current skill level. But oh well, I guess us yapping is getting our thoughts a bit straightened out at least. Is this considered a digital diary? I have no clue anymore but whatever.
~ ? (Too blurry to tell)1/16/26
I actually hate everything right now nothing and noone actually wants to help me and they never have. They all just want me to somehow be perfect. To be able to mask perfectly to just handle situations perfectly. And yet they're all allowed to do anything they want all because what? they have more prilvedge than me? who decided that shit?? for fucks sake what happened to loving ME? What happened to ME being the one prioritized? I get NOTHING in this god forsaken house and for what? all because of some bullshit about trying to cheer me up? what about letting ME decide whether I WANT to be cheered up or not? Huh? what about that? I just want to be seen as someone with just as much privledge as everyone else but NOOOOOO I'm not ALLOWED to have jack shit.
God I would lowkey be better off having never been boorn. I hate how I act. I hate that THIS is what my internal monilogue is like. I just want to be like everyone else. Why can't I be like everyone else? Why can't I be normal? I just want to be normal. Let me be normal. Please.
~?